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A radical awakening book review

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A Radical Awakening by Shefali Tsabary pdf download

Details of A radical awakening book

  • Book Name: A radical awakening
  • Authors:  Dr. Shefali Tsabary
  • Pages: 268
  • Publish Date: 18/05/2021
  • Language: English
  • Genre: Self-Help Book

Book excerpt:


Every radical awakening needs a spark.
This spark ignites the eternal self.
Without that, none of this.

This book is an ode to one of the deepest
friendships I have known.

With another and with myself.

The Time of the Awakened Woman

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she discards her old ways like tossed shoes in the garbage
When she shreds her list of “shoulds” and obligations
And when impossible expectations are burned in an incinerator

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When the approval of others once jewels now turn to pennies in her sock
When the hunt for another is now replaced by a hunt for herself
And when parental tentacles of tradition no longer define her truth

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When her desire to fit in with the crowd dissolves
When her manic compulsion to be perfect vaporizes
And when her obsession to be voted popular eviscerates

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she simply says “no more”
When facade, artifice, and guile leave her nauseated
And when righteousness, dogma, and superiority repulse her

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she no longer fears conflict but faces it boldly like a lioness
When she guards her authenticity as fearlessly as she guards her babies
And when she drops the role of savior knowing she can only save herself

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she no longer cowers in the shadows of her unworthiness
When she no longer plays small so others can feel big
And when she swaps the role of victim for the role of cocreator

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she unabashedly and boldly occupies her ultimate sovereignty
When she finally feels ready to claim her space in the world
And when she redefines compassion as unequivocal self-love

There comes a time in the life of a woman
When she finally releases her childlike dependencies on others
When she dares to rewrite a new mandate of living for herself
One that says:
I release unworthiness and fear
I divorce servility and passivity
I divest inauthenticity and enmeshment
I end the pretense of being someone I am not

And from now on I declare . . .

I will ascend into my highest power
I will embrace my greatest autonomy
I will celebrate my deepest worth
I will embody my fiercest courage and manifest the most authentic me

The time is now
I am ready
To awaken into my renaissance.

Book review 

A Radical Awakening by Dr Shefali, First off, who is this book for? It is for women who are beginning to feel a sense of discontent or disagreement with the ways of the patriarchy, the ways of society and culture and their expectations of women. 

My guess is that such women will be in their 30s or 40s but they could be older too. I myself can identify strongly with such feelings of discontent towards what our culture and traditions do to young girls and women especially the Indian culture that I come from, which is heavily patriarchal.

For many of us, we have been so conditioned by our parents, our society and our culture that we lose our true selves. this book will help you awaken that true self. 

It will help you gain alignment between your inner self and your outer self. a radical awakening is helping me not just in my own growth journey but also it will help me to help with how I talk to my daughter and set the foundations for her to become a strong independent woman, who is not pulled down by the expectations of her parents, culture or traditions. 

One word of warning: this is not a feel-good book. 

It can be compared to a therapy session and just like a therapy session, it might make you cry. because when you see your patterns and see how your past is affecting you, that realization can be painful. 

So if you're concerned about that, this book may not be for you. but that being said I firmly believe that you have to break down to a breakthrough. you cannot awaken without first going through some growing pains. 

So if this book gives you some pain, it is a good kind of pain. in addition to some painful moments, it also gave me a lot of aha moments and feel-good moments, moments that either cleared some of my own self-doubts or reassured me that I was on the right path in my own growth journey. 

I felt like being I felt like I was being mentored by a wiser older woman. thank you Dr Shafali for writing this gem!

Now I'll give you the book summary. 

This book is first going to help you clearly see why you are the way you are. our conditioning starts from our childhood. typically girls are encouraged to be "good girls". we get our validation from our parents whenever we talk softly or help around the house or please our parents, right? 

Now Dr. Shefali is a psychologist, from the dozens of stories of her clients in this book, you will perhaps see how your own childhood influenced the way you are today. 

Dr Shefali talks about various roles that women tend to take on - the giver, the victim, the martyr, the helicopter, the diva, the taker etc. 

She shares stories of her clients who exhibited these roles. after digging deep with these clients and peeling off the layers, they discovered how their childhood caused them to take on these roles. 

Essentially all these roles are the ego's protection mechanism, which worked in our childhood but we don't need it anymore. these roles or facades may have protected us in our childhood, but now they are hurting us. 

From these stories, perhaps you will see yourself exhibiting one or more of these roles. I saw myself in the roles of the giver and the martyr. 

I learned that I need to do a better job of setting boundaries with my family members. I learned that I should not always be putting my kid's needs above my own. 

This is something most mothers do right? we are experts at putting ourselves at the bottom of our priority list. we may not realize but do that is actually a disservice to our kids. 

This book also talks about male and female sexuality, how and why men and women are so different. understanding how men are biologically wired differently from us is an important step in helping us understand men and understanding men will help us in our relationships with them. Dr Shefali also talks about sex and infidelity, marriage and divorce. 

If you're someone who has gone through a divorce or is contemplating it, you would find those particular chapters very helpful. there is also a section on parenting that I found very helpful. 

It is similar to what she says in her other books like awakened family and conscious parenting. I 100% agree with Shefali's thoughts on how when we women compete with each other, we actually strengthen the patriarchy that we don't like. 

One way in which we compete with each other is by going to extreme measures like surgery and botox to make our bodies look a certain way. these procedures may or may not make us look better on the outside, but what they are doing inside to our psychology is simply not good. 

In the words of Dr. Shefali, "why do we reduce ourselves to objects and then complain we are objectified? " I love this line! one thing I want to make clear is that Shefali is not against men. 

Many parts of the book actually emphasize men and the pressures that they face. this book has made me look at my husband in a more positive and awakened way. 

I realized that I keep on wanting him to be more like me. but as a man, he's wired very differently from me. I cannot expect him to parent our kids the way I parent them. 

I cannot expect him to care about a clean house as much as I do. he's almost a different species than me! I have to let him be him. also, everyone is on their own individual growth journey. 

So I should not expect him to do the same things, and I cannot make him do the same things that I'm doing in my own growth journey. for example, I cannot make him eat healthy food or exercise, even though it's for his benefit and I'm doing it out of love for him. 

He will do it when he is ready. I have to let him be him. I do not have to mother him. so for me, this book is definitely worthy of five stars. 

My advice to you is to read this book slowly. don't rush through it. read a bit, reflect on it, maybe journal about it. that's how you will actually grow and evolve. 

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