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Details of What happened to you 

• Book Name: What happened to you 
• Authors:  Oprah Winfrey & Bruce D. Perry
• Pages: 304 pages
• Publish Date: 21-04-2021
• Language: English
  
• Genre: Self-help

Oprah Winfrey what happened to you instead of asking yourself what's wrong with you or why you are behaving that way you can ask yourself a better question which is the title of the book 

what happened to you diving into the book, one hour and a half into the book I actually enjoy listening to the book I just see right now all the amazing things that I have in my life 

that I have because of my parents I'm actually more grateful and at the same time have more understanding about other people's lives other people's experiences and also I just learned that Oprah teamed up with bruce and bruce is not only a psychiatrist he's also a neuroscientist 

so he gives a very nice short to the point succinct explanation about the structure of the brain also the ideas and how our brain works halfway through the book I really enjoy the book I'm making notes I don't forget stuff I think about stuff that I want to share with my friend she has challenges with her children and I think this book is very powerful 

so far it actually delivers on its promise the title of the book and the subtitle are on spot conversations on trauma resilience and healing what happened to you one thing they share is neuroplasticity is our ability to change our brains 

I love that as a good reminder it reminds me of things that I learned in NLP which are actually tools that you can use I can not think about David Goggins and David Goggins book an amazing example of someone going through these traumas and actually healing himself and creating his own self-reliance and resilience 

so David Goggins is in my mind reading this book a little bit because he sort of went through these things without the professional help and still made it through and wow I really enjoy the stories the specific breakdowns the explanations especially the explanations from Dr Bruce perry 

I really like his breakdowns very scientific he also goes back to practice this is the actual solution practice using specific techniques of course to create different neuro associations in our brain and this is the actual way to treat trauma even though they don't go into actual techniques 

I still find the overview very valuable very informative so also here they mention the love as the action and being attentive as I think reading steve steven covey's book 

I think seven habits of highly effective people the definition of love as a verb and then it connects again to how you were loved which is a good thing to I think to reflect on your childhood on your relationships when you were younger to understand how it is affecting you right now in your life 

I think it's an amazing reminder for parents to give the gift of their attention to their children probably the best part in the book so far for me dr perry shares a very touching story about interviewing a three-year-old after going through a traumatic event his sister was abducted in front of his eyes and then she was killed and then he was sent to actually talk to this cute joseph the way that 

He communicates with the child and he opens up a conversation with him gradually creates a connection and he does it very fast it's not through weeks or months it's I think it's one meeting that he had with him but snippets of five minutes interactions he tells all the story I think the value here is far more than just how to treat children with trauma

It's how to connect with people i think this is extremely valuable and practical for teachers for anyone that is working with kids especially one-on-one and maybe find other ways to connect with them and gain trust just this example he shares the story amazing 

So near the end quite excited about this book, it exceeded my expectations by far the only criticism that i wasn't sure I was I felt at times that the only solution is to go and get professional help and 

I think immediately I think well most people don't have access to professional help so what would they do so this is a question they're probably the only criticism I have about the book actually, they answer this question without answering the question they answer 

The question because they present so many examples detailed examples of people going through trauma going to a therapist but they say what they do and they give so much relevant information so you can easily implement it on yourself with your child 

So many tools that you can actually use and if you have access to a therapist this is not enough it doesn't start or end in a one-hour therapy session I also keep thinking about friends of mine I start thinking I have much more empathy for the way that they behave and then overall empathy I just understand how complex the human brain is I finished the book wow 

it wasn't what I expected it felt as if it's like an end of a movie but in the good sense of it like it ended with a boom I don't remember any self-help book that ended like that I actually cried i think three times throughout the book last part I also cried Oprah Winfrey got to me 

wow very powerful she's extremely honest in sharing her life story as well super open I didn't expect this book to be so powerful on so many levels the knowledge the practical tips the reflection it got me to reflect on my life about my own experiences even though I don't see them as traumas but the things that I can do with my addictions with my challenges also thinking about most of my friends and not just them and their children 

I actually kept thinking about the importance of them reading this book In my own experience, I loved the stories I loved the message loads of practical things you can actually that I can actually implement in my life a lot of amazing reminders of the amazing abilities of our brain things that I learned in self-hypnosis things that I learned in NLP other things that I learned in hundreds of other self-help books

This book summarized them extremely well always with the neuroscientific angle from dr perry i also like the structure it was very easy to listen to I find it hard to think about people that I won't recommend the book to the thing with trauma 

As they explain this book it's not necessarily whether you had trauma or not each one of us had some traumatic events in our lives with different severity levels things happened to us this is the summary of the book things happen to us

Whether you call them traumas whether you call them difficult situations things happen to us and they will never go away but we can use them we can utilize them and we can work with them 

We can understand them and grow and move forwards they don't need to be burdened I think the last sentence of the book was nice what happened to you can be your power always 

When I look at the book I think about knowledge versus power extremely high on both a lot of knowledge a lot of tactics of how you can work on yourself how can you work with other people? 

How you can listen what is listening what is trauma they dive in they give you loads of knowledge together with loads of examples and the examples themselves actually reveal the tools the things that you can actually use with people even when it's with children they emphasize 

yes Oprah and dr perry emphasize that you can still do these things with adults it's the same that's it knowledge versus power a lot of knowledge a lot of power and I was actually amazed by the book.

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